Monday, August 11, 2008

Do I Create or Destroy??

Proverbs 18:21 "The tongue has the power of life and death...

"I am going to admit my wrong tonight in hopes that it helps someone else. I think one of the things God likes most about me is that I am very open and honest before Him. I am not afraid to admit my wrongs and shortcomings to Him in prayer when I am pricked in my heart and stopped by a little nudge. I am not too big to go back and apologize when I need to.

Today I was having one of those busy days. So many things to do on the list, so many little cares and worries. So many questions rolling around in my head...many to which I have no answers to. The phone was ringing off the hook, the teapot was screaming at me that it was boiling. My life was truly in one of the chaotic moments.My precious little boy came running when he hear the teapot whistling. See, he loves to help his mommy make tea. He puts the sugar in for me, (sometimes spilling quite a bit before it ever hits the pitcher.) He likes to stir the tea and to add the water to it. He makes such a mess when he helps with it, but he enjoys it and it makes him feel so big!

Today when he came running and asking to help, I said words to him that I wished I would have swallowed instead of speaking them out loud. My response was, "Landon, mommy is very stressed and busy. I don't have time to clean up your spills and the mess that you make when you help with the tea. Mommy will do it. You go play.

"Instantly! I felt the destruction of those words spoken into this little boys life. I had just spoken words that told him of all the negative things he does when he is trying to HELP his mom. I pointed out the fact that his little hands are not steady, they are unskilled, unlearned...I pointed out that he made more of a mess than he helped and that it was a bother for me to clean up his mistakes. Oh God, forgive my insensitively. I picked him up with tears in my eyes and said to him that mommy was sorry...that mommy should have told him how much she loved him to help her...mommy needs someone like him to help her remember the simple joy of putting sugar into tea and stirring it till it is perfect! I put the canister in front of him and let him add the sugar his way, and stir the tea himself like he loves to do. And...there wasn't near the mess he normally makes!

See, you may think I'm crazy or being too dramatic, but our words have power in them. Words can motivate, energize, inspire...but words can also destroy or created despair in someone. Many a person has lost their ability or desire to do something or to achieve things they could have because of words spoken to them. There are many stories in the world today regarding the power or the infulence that words spoken to them had in their life. There are some instances where those words had a negative effect on a life. However, there are just as many stories of individuals who have been encouraged, challenged, and comforted by words that made a difference in their life.I want to be careful that my words to Landon create a positive effect on him.

I've seen children do one of two things...they will either rise to the expectation that an adult has of them, or they will fall to the expection that an adult has of them. Let me explain. I've seen a child that had every reason and excuse (because of his home life and atmosphere) rise up and become somehing great because a Sunday School teacher and a minister believed in him and spoke positive things into his heart and life. (I know because I was that SS teacher and my husband was that minister that took him under their wing and nutured him and reinforced the negative he was receiving at home with positive words when he came to Sunday School.)I know the power that words have over small, innocent lives!

The point of this blog is to keep myself in check. To make sure that no matter what kind of day it is for me, that I speak words that give life to my little guy and not words that will destroy him or his dreams. So my little "Note To SELF" here tonight would be..."Carol, T.H.I.N.K. before you T.A.L.K.!!!

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